San Diego

It’s cold and dark, all except that bonfire going on about 500 yards away from us. We were sitting on the sand in silence even though there were 7 of us total, 4 Irish and 3 Americans. It was the Irish’s first time to California and we wanted to make it as fun as possible for them. We hadn’t reached our goal yet with the first night being epically mediocre pre-gaming at my friends house then heading to the beach because we had nothing else to do. The Irish weren’t 21 yet and their “Europe age card” didn’t work at a club. We were sitting on the side lines of what looked like an epic party on the beach, all thinking the same thing but no one wanted to be the first to move for fear of what that would mean.

“Fuck it.” I heard come out of my mouth before I could even realize what was happening. I don’t know what came over me, I just felt a pull.

“Let’s go.” I stood up and started walking to the fire like it was calling my name. One by one everyone got up and started to slowly follow me to the bon fire. There are a lot of people there, I thought to myself as we got closer to the party. No one is going to really notice 6 extra guys and a girl. I think I knew I was totally bullshitting myself just to muster up some courage. Who just walks in on someone else’s bon fire while they are still there?

I remember the moment the air and sand grew warmer. With my heart beat raging in my ear, pumping the adrenaline throughout my body we walked up to the party and just acted as if we belonged there. At first we all kind of stood on the outskirts of everyone there until one of the Irish started talking to some guy standing next to us.

Next thing I knew we were laughing and drinking some guys beer hanging by the fire. The rest of the night we were part of the crew, laughing, wrestling, and drinking with strangers on some beach in PB. I stepped away from the shenanigans to kneel by the fire at one point for some quiet reflection. I couldn’t believe it, I actually got all of us into this bonfire, and I don’t even know how I did it. I just…went with it. As I was roasting my hands by the fire patting myself on the back I saw a young guy come up beside me and throw in an empty cardboard bud light box into the fire. I looked at him with a smile hoping to God he wouldn’t ask me who I was and ask me to leave. I was moments away from my gig being up when he returned the smile and said “Hey thanks for letting us join your bon fire.” then walked away back to a group of people hanging to one side of the fire.

“Oh yea, of course…” what the…

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